The Internal Return/The Infernal Return

Whenever reality threatened to drown him, the composer Giacinto Scelsi would sound a single note on his piano for hours. What fantastic island was calling him to its stranging shores?

      (Repeat: to do or say again.)
      (Return: to go or come back.)

Some repeat to remember, others repeat to forget, I repeat to keep (to lose) myself at the uncertain edge between remembering and
forgetting – now-here’s wavering shore.

      (French repeter, to go back to.)
      (French retorner, to turn back.)

Never again . . . ever again . . . virgin . . . again . . . With the metallic patience of a stubborn alchemist I’m transmuting every leaden never again into gold.

      (Latin re + petere, to seek.)
      (Greek tornos, tool for drawing a circle, also lathe.)

Every artist is an escape artist binding himself again and against to reenact the primal thrill of breaking out.

      (Indo-European pet-, to rush, to fly; hence feather, appetite, pen, symptom.)
      (Indo-European ter-, to rub, to turn; hence threshold, detour, throw, thread, trauma.)

Shrouded by habit’s suffocating embrace, what stifled worm’s crushed wings are struggling to unfold?




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